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sâmbătă, august 22

auto-ironia americana

Spread the Stupidity
Only in  America drugstores make the sick walk all the way
to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy
people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in  America people order double cheeseburgers, large
fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America banks leave vault doors open and then chain
the pens to the counters.

Only in  America we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in
the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in  America we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and
buns in packages of eight.

Only in  America they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why can't women  put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid
made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injectio= ns?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why
don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

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